Daddy

His body lies still, covered with only a quilt that looked like something his mother had made. She noticed the cowboy boots, they were his favorite pair. How he missed dancing and performing in them. Now he will dance in the sky, watching over his loved ones.

She walked up to greet the man she once knew as her father, now just a body, his soul has flown back into the universe to be reunited with his family.

She kissed his forehead, so cold, so motionless and felt her breath taken away as the tears streamed down her cheeks. She whispered “I love you daddy, I miss you, may you be free to spread your wings and soar high in the grandiose sky.”

Family Is Most Important

Even if that means having to drive or fly or ride hundreds or thousands of miles.

When I found out that my sister, who lives 4 hours away, had an accident on her bicycle and shattered her leg, I was worried sick! Literally!! (I was sick from a bad cold.) I wished I could help take care of her when she needed me most. So, I made it happen. When she was released from the hospital, I made the necessary arrangements and drove myself and two of my girls up to Clovis to help my sisters mother-in-law take care of my sister.

The car ride from Santa Clarita to Clovis is pretty boaring, nothing to see but fields and dairy and grain mills. The girls did very good on the drive up and back. When Mia started to ask, “How long until we get there.” I made a game of it. I would tell them how many more miles when we passed the marker and then tell them how many minutes. I would try to point out whatever looked attractive to kill time. We also played “I Spy” but that got to be redundant since there were only cars, trucks and billboards most of the way.

When we arrived at our destination, we were all relieved and ready to visit with my sister. The anticipation of seeing what her leg looked like was eating at us. There she was, lying in bed with four rods and a metal bar holding her leg together. Holy cow, that wasn’t what I expected to see. “Her leg is under contruction”, I said to the girls. They kinda giggled and asked their Aunt if it hurt. Apparently, it didn’t hurt at the moment because she had some pretty good pain medicine. Any movement though, and it hurt like heck! Thank goodness her leg doesn’t have to stay in that contraption for long, another surgery is scheduled to take out the pins and place a plate and screws in. Then…the real healing can begin.

Helping my sister do the little things that we all take for granted every day was a humbling experince for me and the girls. We can adjust ourselves in bed to get comfortable. We can get ourselves out of bed, and walk down the hall. We can get up to make sandwich or get a drink of water. All these things, basically anything, she can no longer do by herself. She will not be able to put any kind of pressure on her leg for months to come.

I wish I lived closer so I could help more. It’s hard being far away and knowing your loved ones need you. There are a few family members in Clovis that help out. Thankfully, she has a great mother-in-law and father-in-law who are willing to take care of her when no one else can. Her husband is awesome and her step-childern are great care-takers too. I felt better knowing that she will be in good hands. We will make another visit in a few weeks to see how she is progressing.

On a lighter note, My sister just became a grandmother and her son happens to live in Clovis too! I got to see my two-week old great-nephew, that was a special treat!

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Life experience and raising kids

How many of you have learned from experience?   I have learned almost everything I know from life experience.  I took my time when it came certain aspects in life but not so much in others.  Thinking it would be easy, but not knowing in whole…only part.

When it came to work, I decided that I needed to learn everything, cooking, cleaning, baking, fast food, secretarial and even legal stuff.  I always kept my mind wide open for a new adventure and so now another begins.  This new adventure is called parenthood.  Although, I have been a mother for 15 years, it’s always a new adventure every day of every year.  This new life experience is grand, joyous, depressing, breathtaking, sad and every other emotion in between.  I have never worked a harder job in my life and I would not give it up for anything in the world.

Raising my three girls, 15, 11 and 6 and taking part in raising my nephew for 6 years who is now 21, helps me to stay young and makes me feel old at the same time.  When they have the experiences that I did as a child, it brings back many memories.    I try to tell them, “Oh, I remember when I went through that”.  I feel like I am helping them through the issue by sharing my story.  Sometimes it helps and other times I get the, “mom, it’s not like that anymore” answer or look.  There is one thing I am very grateful for is that my children do not talk to me in a demeaning manner.  It’s probably because I do not speak to them like that.  I try to explain the reason why I am upset, it doesn’t always happen like like that.  But, a valuable lesson learned from a parenting class I took and working in a daycare or preschool is, when you are so upset you feel like you are about to lose it is..take a deep breath, close your eyes and count backwards from 10 slowly.  By the time you get to 10, you can usually control your emotions.  Go on and try it, I bet it works for you at least once!

As we move forward in our everyday life, I learn new ways to control my emotions.  Life experience, life they say, there is no manual to raising children, you try, you live and you learn.  I invite you all to take a peek into my life experience as I share the good, the bad and the ugly, but mostly, the awesome that comes with a great family.

I have many, many stories and pictures to share with all of you. Thank you for taking the time to read, I hope you all enjoy!

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